Friday has once again brought about it's very own feeling... and it has nothing whatsoever to do with what I ate at lunch. The feeling about which I write is that sense of wonder, excitement and sweat: indoor football.
For the record, it was not the organiser who picked this week's teams; that buck had been passed up the management hierarchy to the Baron of the pitch. And I think we all know who that is. So, with the legalities out of the way it's on with the report.
From the very start, things were tighter than the belts of many blind men playing charades after Christmas turkey. Wallace and Martin were feeding balls to Hill through the small gaps in the opposing defence, but the keeping skills of our very own Protector of the Peace, Gav Todd, were something to be reckoned with.
Gav's team responded with some fabulous trickery from our Italian friend, Pete, and some steady striking from Tim. But Ricky Allison is in his element in nets - nothing was getting passed him. Or so the crowds of onlookers thought...
It started with a clearance from nets by Gav to Pete, who ran up the left-hand side of the pitch and met Guv. Guv did well to hold the short-haired man and Pete was left with no option but to lob the ball further up the pitch to Ormo-san who turned around and, on the volley, struck the big yellow ball with his left foot straight into the back of the net. Flawless!
The next deadly movement by the winning team was once again started from the back by Pete who moved the big yellow ball forward and passed to Tim on the right-hand side. The tag-team attack of Guv and Hugh was too much for Hatchet Matchett and Ingram perceived this. With a stealthy run in behind Ricky Allison, Ingram gave out a shout, Tim responded with the ball and Ingram put the ball passed Hill in nets at a healthy 60 miles per hour.
Those in the team that lost deflated faster than the whoopie cushain that was once placed under Pavarotti. Thus, the winning team was able to slot a few extra shots in the right place and tally up the points on the board. So what started out as a match tighter than Sharon Osbourne's latest face lift ended up as one-sided as Ricky Allison against anyone in a pizza eating contest.
Until next week...
Winners
Tim "Forever The Baron" Matchett for some fantastic striking of that which is the football.