:: Score ::

Jack the Lad (More Than The Losers) 14 - Janey the Lady (Less Than The Winners) 11

August 23rd 2004, Antrim Forum


Reporter At The Front Lines: Faron the Fathomable

Apologies for delay in reportage Slay-miesters. Alas, since turning professional in my barondomage from the amateur I once was, time is, as they say... of the "evan"essence. Isnt their music great?!

Tension was high, sweat was beginning to pour, the heat was rising... and still Pritchard was confronted with three thousand poor beggars lining up outside Sub-Gay ready to make themselves even fatter. A slayer in the true sense of the word, was WWF(working without football) last week.

"Learn all you can from the mistakes of others.
You won't have time to make them all yourself."
Baron, "A 9am Text Message", 23.08.04
Anyhow, back to the match or at least lets say something in the first place about the match. Faron "Fag-Shoes" Mache picked the line ups again but thankfully got them right this time much to the pleasure of Jonay "My New Name Is Jonay" Jonay "Get Used To My New Name" Jonay "Why Aren't You Calling Me Jonay?" Jonay, Jonay, Jonay. All participants turned up by 7:05pm at the very latest - well done everyone.

Play was frenetic and constant for long periods of the game (about sixty minutes roughly). Its been so long since the game was played I've forgotten all knowledge of it but no doubt it was class!

However, I'm almost positive young Dee "Check Out My Fitness Regime" Fit-Boy McFit scored almost all of the Janey the Lady's goals while the rest of the team looked on in admiration...vat the big new green net seperating the halls. No doubt Mark "Balanced Like A One Legged Clown On Stilts" Bingram almost crocked himself while sacrificing his health for the good of the team in a death defying tackle. Between flashbacks of Nam, I can just about remember Dave "Alan" Shearer come close with a few shots, in terms of close to the basketball net on the roof! Of course he was following the lead of Faronacious, John "Tai Chi" Jap Boy and FUVENER! We all knew how much Dee "New AC Mee-lan" Shirt loved scoring, so left it to him. Aw bless, he always looks so happy to score, he don't get out much.

As far as the Jack Lads were concerned, they played it cool like Ice-T and Vanilla Ice on a US Re-union Tour in Alaska, supported my MC Hammer. Clod "There's A Place Called Claudy" Clodster wove an intricate web of passing manouvres (who invented the spelling for this word?!) that Spider Man would have been proud of. That is if Spider man was real and not some fictional character. Interaction between Jonay "Jonay Forever" Jonay, Mark "Plimsole" White, Samuel "Get My Nips Out" STEADY and Party "My fav song is..." Boy was quite good. Unfortunately by 19:45 that beavening their play got a lot better.

Hence those cheeky bounders ended up winning 14-11 after a close ten minute period of it being 10-10 and because Dee stopped scoring mean't the Janey team were screwed.

I really should get back to work now... ;)

Teams

Winners - Clod "long shot" Sniper, Piece "...thong song" Party Boy, Jonay "JONAY!" Jonay, Samuel "Well Done" GCSE Boy, Mark "Please Don't Edit This Report" From the Faronage
Losers - Dee "Party Boy Of The Week" Dee, Faron "Faronable" Estates, John "Chan" Touch of Death, FUVENER, Nichol "Fichol" In A Pickle

SparBoot (Shouldn't this be called the Party Boot now?)

To the "Party Boy" Dee. Its okay, he won't get it next week... he's not playing!